47 down

It fits!!

stinky caca poopy

Well.

Yesterday morning after John flushed the toilet upstairs I heard a "bloop bloop" bubbling sound coming from the toilet downstairs. We investigated to find that the water level was high. We flushed it and everything seemed okay. Later in the afternoon the downstairs tub was filled with gunky residue that looked like it had backwashed up the drain and then seeped (the liquid, anyway) back down.

Fast forward to 7:00 p.m. Luciya is asleep and as I'm sneaking into the room to check on her I notice Stenchy McStenchfart seeping from the bathroom. It was too, too gross. Foul sh*t water and soggy brown toilet paper had poured from beneath the closed lid of the toilet and was sitting about 4 inches deep in the bathtub. In the laundry room, a drain in the floor had overflowed to make a nice round puddle.

The plumber made it here at about 9:30 pm and was here until 11:00. We scoured the front lawn, with the help of two neighbors and one flashlight, for signs of a valve to the septic tank. (Never found one). The plumber returned at 9:00 this morning (and yes, I peed in the back yard last night - twice and went to Stroller Strides this morning stinky and un-showered). They removed both toilets, replaced one (ca-ching), and ran a camera snake through the hole left by the other one (ca-ching, ca-ching), where they discovered the roots of the giant tree in the front yard had broken through decades-old pipes to block the flow of "solids."

They managed to clear the pipes for what may be a week, may be a month. We'll be able to use the toilet and showers until they have to come again (ca-ching times infinity), tear up the front lawn, hopefully find the pipe (nine feet down? Possibly.), and replace it. We'll be responsible for the landscaping repair (ca - whatever). (So those of you coming to our September wedding will know why the grass will most likely be a different color. At best.)

I was thinking last night about how we used to say in Hawaii that Mother Maui is the type of place that will either welcome and accept you with open arms if you're supposed to be there (good job, good friends, good housing, etc.), or chew you up and spit you out if you're not (no job, wrong friends, and your house gets broken into. And your wallet is stolen). We were, obviously, in the lucky first camp. And it makes me wonder: does Idaho possess any of those same mystical qualities? Are we being told somehow that maybe this isn't a good fit? I mean, seriously? John loses his job and we're suddenly slapped in the kisser with emergency dog surgery, truck repair, and poop flooding? Did we not give enough to charity last year?

Or should we just suck it up and laugh about this 50 years from now when we're sitting on this re-cemented front porch directly over the septic tank and say, "This was all so worth it."?

30

I'm thirty today.


Holy crap.

eLLe - 11 months

Dear Luciya,

Happy eleven months!


Well, look who's standing up all by herself. Up until about 3 days ago that was one of the crowning achievements of your eleventh month. And then, you walked. And we're still lolling in the aftershocks of this insane achievement.

You're taking a few steps here and there each day. You wobble and bobble and are so tentative before you take each step, and after you do you look up to our faces to make sure we saw it. Or maybe it's to make sure we're still there, because the ground is suddenly a lot farther away.


A couple weeks ago you started doing the most hilarious thing: drumming your fingers against your lips as you made noises. Your new favorite sound is belup-belup-belup. You'll make this noise when you wake up in the morning or from a nap, happily belup-belupping in your crib for a while until you're ready to come on out and greet the day. You cheeky little monkey, you.


lickteschtein from shemmy on Vimeo.

When you're up, your new favorite activity is the exploration of drawers and cupboards. You've figured out how to pull on knobs and handles, and then you systematically extract the contents and toss them over your shoulder. Just yesterday you figured out how to open the glass doors that encase the DVD player and cable box. I fastened them closed with our trusty friend, the rubber band. Ol' rubber band lives on every pair of cupboards in the kitchen except the ones that hold the towels, the tupperware, and the ziploc baggies. But you know this already. You are a huge fan of pulling the zilpoc bags out of their box one at a time.

Your comprehension of what we say to you is suddenly out of this world. One of my favorite things to say to you is "kisses." If you're standing at one of the full-length closet mirrors and I say "kisses," you'll lean in to the glass and smack one on your pretty little reflection. You'll lean in to me or your daddy so that we can give you kisses when we ask to.

You've also learned "hi" and "bye-bye," or at least what to do when anyone says one or the other. You flail your little arms from the shoulder (sometimes one arm, sometimes two) and bid your fond salutations.

All these firsts are just so much fun to witness. This morning you went to your first Easter egg hunt. I know that next year and in the Springs to follow you'll be bounding through the brush and scooping up all the plastic eggs you can find, dropping fistfuls of sticky jellybeans into your mouth. But today was pretty sweet. You managed to pick up a few eggs and drop them into the ducky basket that Aunty Betskers gave you before you were born (you were due on Easter last year, remember?).


funny bunny from shemmy on Vimeo.

Your culinary tastes have expanded to things like tofu, raspberries, and frozen organic green beans that I run under warm water for a few seconds to soften them up a little before you suck out the still-cold middles. You are becoming such a pro at feeding yourself that you seem irritated when I try to give you food from your bowl or jar. You are also seriously irritated by any type of bib and can yank off whichever type we try to put on you at meal time, be it snap, velcro, over over your head like the cloth diapers I've cut holes in.


Your sleep patterns lately have been random at best. I'd say that on average you sleep completely through the night (and we're talking 12 hours!) about three nights a week. The other nights you've been quite squirmy and squirrelly, and on more than one occasion this month I've gotten up to nurse you at 4 a.m. But my goodness - any number of things could be interfering with your sleep. Your gummy friends Pokey and Buddy continue their ascent. You're gradually becoming bipedal. And you are suddenly huge.

Your daddy figured you must be going through a growth spurt, and sure in enough, this morning your pajamas were torn to shreds, you had a full set of teeth and you were studying for your SATs.


Good thing I can still cuddle you completely in my arms.


I love you, Luciya!

Love,
Mama

crazy/beautiful

texas ranger! from shemmy on Vimeo.

What happened? Daddy had just finished giving her a bath and was about to put on her diaper when she stood on her own and decided it was time to walk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's more, if you can't get enough (we can't!):


walk the line from shemmy on Vimeo.

baby's first avocado

i don't believe it!

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Family genealogy - Family pictures

auma

Dear Kelly,


I just wanted to give you a little shout out and thank you for being the most awesomest of the awesome.

For the past twelve years you've had a way of breaking my blues and summoning the smiles out of me.

You are like a fresh baked, fudgy brownie: sweet and warm and full of ooey gooey delicious comfort.


You have the ability to make me laugh like no one else can. You soothe me. You put you little hand on my shaking heart and say "There, there, Mamma's here, don't mind me, it's all gonna be alright." And I totally believe you.

Thanks for coming to visit us, for loving my daughter, and especially for offering your help in our upcoming wedding. Somehow I forgot that you're an event planner by trade. It will be the best wedding ever! And you, my lovely made of honor, will have to work hard to not outshine me. Just this once. Cuz, you know, I'm the bride. The lucky, lucky bride.


I love you, Mamma!

Love,
Hamflounderbone

P.S. The other day I came across this poem I wrote to you 7 years ago, after we had graduated college, I'd moved to Maui, and you were across the universe in Prague:

You are the best thing that's happened to me
From the first day you showed me my friends in the tree
You're better than popcorn and Vendage merlot
Better than sled rides by a lake in the snow
And the perfect Road Buddy wherever we'll venture
When we're young or we're fat, with teeth or with dentures
I love living my life by your antecdotes
And hearing your voice through numbered post-it notes
I know we'll be laughing till we're wilted and gray
We'll drink and we'll smoke and still fall down and play
We'll reap all the joys that our good lives deserve
(Though I'll have to improve on my shuttle cock serve)
Though I live in the sun in this high island bliss
It is always you that I love and I miss
But though our lives lead us to live far apart
Know you'll always have a home in my heart
The end is long off, but once we're in it
We'll jump back into life... and begin it.


College was the best, wasn't it?!

nervy!

I teach my first stations of Stroller Strides tomorrow. I am excited. A little nervous, but I have a feeling I'll be pulling on all my experience in front of the wee ones on Maui and effectively acting like a crazy person, but what the hey - the kids all loved me, right?

John has been out of town since Tuesday and gets back on Saturday. Really, I don't know how single mothers do it. Especially single mothers who work outside the home. I am so fortunate to have an involved daddy. Hurry back, I said!

John is working with his family on an internet venture in beautiful, warm, sunny, calm Southern California. I am surrounded by trails of thousands of ants and multiple poopy diapers a day. Creepy crawlies and squishy smellies! 

Can I blame it on all this, then, that I totally stood up a friend tonight? That I actually had a social engagement, with a live person, and I flaked?! I didn't show or call?! I forgot?! (And I wonder why I don't have friends...)

(Sorry, Kori!)

pokey and buddy

Last Saturday night Luciya slept fitfully. She kept letting out pained little cries. Normally, I would go in and check on her, but I didn't, because I KNEW what was happening. Sure enough, on Oscar Sunday I stuck my thumb on her bottom gums and felt the spiky little crowns of two new friends: Pokey and Buddy.

Pokey is on her right and Buddy is on the left. They're getting a little more visible each day: two little white dashes in the center of her gums. My bet is on Pokey showing up first, but we'll see.

Did you hear me? Luciya is teething!

And she's shitting her pants at an alarming rate. Sorry, but I just had to pause in writing this because another diarrhea squirt interrupted us. I don't know if it's because of the teething or what, but poor child has been filling her diapers to overflowing several times a day for the past 3 days. Yeesh. Her mood is fine, though, and she seems well enough. If by tomorrow his hasn't cleared up I'll call Dr. Angie.

Luciya has tooth buds!!

my new boyfriend

So, driving home from Stroller Strides this morning I was behind a pickup truck owned by my new boyfriend. He had a few bumper stickers on his truck that totally turned me on. The first: "I brake for animals. Then I skin them and eat them."

The second: "Guns kill people like spoons made Rosie O'Donnell fat."

I didn't catch all of the third one, since it was essentially a paragraph in small type under the banner of GUN CONTROL. But I did read far enough to see that it had something to do with a woman being brought into an alley, raped, and strangled with her panty hose. Really? You put that on your car?

I tried to get his number but he suddenly turned into a parking lot. Maybe he didn't like the look on my face or something? Oh, well. Someday.

joy: a message from luciya

Bring joy to people whenever you can.

eLLe - 10 months

Dear Nutter Butter,

You are ten months old today! Congratulations!

I don't know why I'm on a "Nuts" theme with your nicknames these days. For the first five or so months of your life it was "Monkey": Monk, Monkfish, Monkbone, Monkey Doodle Dandy. Then, I moved on to "Toots": Tooty, Tooter, Tootface, Toot Bottom. And now, your strange Mama is on "Nuts." Nut Face, Nutty, Nutbone, Nutty Buddy, Nut Belly, Nutter. Sometimes I'll combine fun snippets from all of the above, and call you things like Tootnut or Tooty Monkbottom or Nutty Monkfish. You can totally bring this post into therapy with you.

Ten months. Gee willakers. What a fun 10-month-old babe you are. You're everywhere! You're pulling, reaching, straining, climbing. You zip out of the room and are halfway up the stairs before I have a chance to turn around. You're "cruising" the furniture, pulling yourself up and sidestepping all the way around the coffee table or down the length of the couch.  You have stood without support for up to five seconds. Look out world - here comes the new Walker, Texas Ranger!

You still don't have teeth. Honestly, part of me was wondering if you aren't some kind of anomalous toothless ten-month-old toddler, but more and more mothers have been assuring me that their little ones didn't get teeth till 11 months or so. Granted, they got four teeth at once, or vampire incisors first, but they are now sporting sweet lil' baby smiles and appear to be completely normal. So, you know, I'm cool with that.

I am learning that teeth don't have to be present to eat, however. All of a sudden, you can chow down! We're feeding you bits of pasta, shredded cheese, pieces of toast, and chicken bones! Okay, maybe not that last bit, but you are officially joining us for meals in your new high chair. We finally had to spring for one of those because you've outgrown the Bumbo sitter. But I have to say I am really enjoying it. I can plop you in, sprinkle a few Cheerios on the tray and actually turn away for a minute to wash a dish or pick my teeth in the mirror. You like it, too! You're coming thisclose to clapping when you're excited to sit in your chair. Sure, it kind of looks like you're just flailing your arms haphazardly, and your little hands have yet to actually make contact with each other, but those of us "in the know" realize you're showing your delighted approval of things.

And to show your disproval, you squawk. And screech. And squeal. I admit it, I have referred to you as "annoying" on more than one occasion this month. I also admit I tried drinking caffeine this month. And I'm realizing that as long as we're nursing (which I still absolutely relish, though you're slowly -sniff- showing signs of not being that into it anymore), I should lay off, because that single shot of Starbucks goes straight to your itchy little larynx. 

You are curious and inquisitive. You follow sounds by craning your whole little body, and intrigue registers openly on your angelic face. You're very bright. You have begun flipping the pages of the books we read together, and your wee thumb gets in there to turn just one board book page at a time. "Book" is one of the words that I'm almost positive you recognize. I say "Where's your book?" and you crawl right over to the toy stack in whatever room we're in and pull one out. You also know (I'm pretty sure): Mila, eat, bottle, Daddy, bath, bubbles, Luciya, butterfly, ball, and clown. And you also know I love you very much.

I often think about how saying I love you doesn't even come close to the way I truly feel about you. You are the truest voice in my soul, the purest blend of every emotion ever conceived. And now that you've - incredibly - been out of my body longer than you were in it, I realize how truly blessed I am to have had this time to experience being alive.

I love you, Luciya!

Love,

Mama

sprung?

I woke up last week to the sound of birdsong. One of those things you don't realize has been gone until you hear it again. What a welcome sound! It has been hovering between 40 and 50 degrees for over a week now, with blue skies and light breezes. I hear a lawn mower starting up next door. Is Spring here? Let's hope so!

We celebrated Valentine's Day by going to court. Well, that's how we started the day, anyway. We had to go defend ourselves (by pleading guilty) for Mila's Thanksgiving escape and our subsequent "dog at large" charge. We sat in the back of the courtroom and listened to a few of the cases (fascinating stuff! We heard from a sleazy-looking guy who had been caught with a syringe and a 17-year-old smoker who was told to make a poster for his high school about the dangers of cigarettes) and I tried to keep Luciya quiet-ish with a bottle. The judge suddenly asked whose baby that was and I apologized, thinking we were being too distracting. He was actually being Mr. Nice Judge and said, "It's Valentine's Day, and I know your family doesn't want to spend it in the courtroom." He bumped up John on the list and ended up dropping the license charge and reducing a potential $200+ fee to ten bucks plus court costs. We left fairly satisfied. I said "Thanks, Your Honor." (John and I both admitted, though, that it would have been interesting to be able to stay and hear some of the other cases before the jude; there were a couple shady looking teenage boy in front of us and I wanted to know just what schenanigans they'd been up to.)

We had Costco crab legs for dinner that night. I absolutely drowned mine in melted garlic butter and inhaled everything. Delish! 

John still hasn't found work, but a couple opportunities have presented themselves and it will be interesting to see where they go. He has an appointment with Fuddrucker's onWednesday. Keep your fingers crossed! 

stuck

Ms. Smarty Pants was playing in her big-girl room when she shut the door and sat behind it. 

 

stuck! from shemmy on Vimeo.

food is good for you: a message from luciya

Milk. It does a body good.


You should always try everything once.


You may not like it at first.


It's okay if some gets on your clothes.


Hmmm, what else.

Cheerios are a good snack.


I always make sure I didn't miss anything.

A little after-dinner apple juice always hits the spot.


Afterwards, don't forget to clean up!

Then you'll get to go outside and play.

chew low, sweet chariot

So, in my Complainer Connie mode the other day, when I was bitchin' and hemmin' and hawin' about how MISERABLE January was, I forgot to mention even more reasons why we've been feeling like Life has branded us with a gigantic "Kick Me" sign.

Oh, January was just AWFUL.

First of all, we made the mistake of traveling as a family to San Diego, where John's family live. Luciya *had* to spend time with her beautiful, giggleicious cousins and was forced to surprise her big sister and make her cry with happiness. AND she had to spend Quality Time with Grams and Grandpa Peter. Ick.

Brown-eyed girls.

We were forced to go to San Diego because I've had the misfortune of being totally inspired by this fitness program I've been attending called Stroller Strides, which has gotten me feeling better about my body than even before I was pregnant. My totally cute and perky franchisee asked if I'd like to be an instructor for the classes, and I suppose it sounded like the best idea ever, so we grudgingly found a way to make it down to sunny Southern California, where I spent two full days with disgustingly inspiring women, including one of my best friends from college, who also stayed with us at John's parents' amazing house. I know, I know... but the drama doesn't end there.

While in San Diego, we had to relax in the hot tub and celebrate little Devon's fifth birthday at a park. I got two days of fantastic workouts right down by the water, just a stone's throw from Sea World. *Sigh*.

Grams, Eryn, and Luciya in the park. In the SUN.

I know I mentioned how horrible it's been since John lost his job, but did I say how much it sucks that he and Luciya have been spending some terribly adorable father-daughter time together? And that I just despise the fact that I've actually gotten to take a few naps?! And spend time painting?! Please.

In January we also had to shoulder the burden of a trip to the winter wonderland lake town of McCall, where John and I practically had the whole ski hill to ourselves on a fresh-powder, blue sky day. Tutu was there to play with Luciya, and John and I spent the first two nights ever away from Luciya because that mean old Tutu offered to watch her. Barf.

But I have to say the absolute WORST part about this past January were what are now infamously known as The Ciullo Days.

Mikey and Clancy Ciullo (sorry, guys, I just can't call you Michael and Nancy. It just feels weird in my mouth) are our best friends from Maui. This sibling duo has been our main support system for years. Mikey, John's not-so-secret lover, will be the best man in our September wedding. He and John have known each other for 13 years or something like that. Clancy will be a bridesmaid. They each moved from the island of Maui within a week of each other at the beginning of the year, and they each made a week-long trip to frostbitten Boise to see the babe (whom they haven't seen since she was eight weeks old!) and catch up. Needless to say, we were completely miserable the whole time they were here.

This is Uncle Mikey.

Obviously, he had an awful time in Boise and didn't bond with Luciya at all. He must have been feigning the laughs we had bowling, and biting his tongue as Luciya hugged and crawled all over him. I think he was probably very unhappy to spend time with us, not to mention that fact that we was forced to go snowboarding at Bogus Basin no less than three times. Oh, and this probably ruffled his tailfeathers as much as it did mine:

How to have fun in Boise in the Winter.

No wonder we haven't heard from him since he moved to the Virgin Islands to work on a sailboat.

This is his sister, Aunty Clancy.

Aunty Clancy is ridiculously funny and terribly sweet. She came to Idaho toting her positivity and sunshine (too bad we couldn't return the favor). You can imagine how torturous that was. She and Luciya were crazy about each other. And she had the audacity to have a good time mostly spent at the house, since we're all watching our budgets.

Ugh, the Ciullos. No, we don't miss you guys, as a matter of fact. We don't long for your tangible friendship every day. So there.

Please, keep your good thoughts coming to us. As you can see, times are rough. We're struggling, but we're managing to struggle with painted-on smiles.

February, get ready.

here comes trouble!

step in time from shemmy on Vimeo.

... and we wonder why we don't have friends

Actual conversation while watching TV last night:

Ton Ton: "Honey, have you seen my watch?"

Shemmy: "Oh, it's on top of your head, Hon."

Ton Ton: "What?!"

Shemmy: "Yeah. Just put your hand up there, you'll feel it."

Ton Ton: "That's crazy."

Shemmy: "I know!"

About 30 minutes later...

Shemmy: "Honey, have you seen the remote control?"

Ton Ton: "Oh hey, it's on your shoulder."

Shemmy: "What?!"

Ton Ton: "Yeah, it's right there... up on your right shoulder."

Shemmy: "That's crazy!"

Ton Ton: "I know!"

coney baloney the sleepwalking wallbanger

We carried Mila downstairs after her little surgery and blocked the stairs so she cold walk up and down them. She was zoned out from being under and fell asleep right away on her little bed.

At 2:30 Luciya stirred to cry and only went about 20 minutes. We went back to sleep and then I woke up about five minutes later to a loud SMACK! And then another BANG! I woke up John (yeah, kind of a deep sleeper). I told him I thought Mila was walking around. We sat up in bed and sure enough, old Zoney Conehead jumps up onto the bed with the wide sides of her plastic cone slicing the covers as she tried to figure out what in Sam Hill was going on.

John picked her up and placed her on the floor (she's not supposed to be jumping up or down, or on the stairs, etc.) and led her back into the living room. On the way there was a CRACK! (wall) and a SCRAPE (floor) and a BOOM! (door jamb). Poor little thing. She's just so confused.

Help meeeeee........